“I am a 38-year-old man. My father died 25 years ago. I am responsible for my mother and my four brothers. I started working from the age of 10 and built myself from scratch until now, thank God we are in a stable situation. I completed my university education and now work in commerce. I have a problem that bothers me in my marriage. My marriage was traditional. My mother researched and chose a wife for me. To my wife for the first time on the wedding day, but until now my wife does not know how to cook even though my sister and mother are trying hard to teach her cooking and the ingredients, but unfortunately she did not learn.

My mother said that I should divorce her because her family lied to us and said that she is a cook and she does not know the simplest things. But three months ago, I took my wife to her family’s house for three weeks to learn how to cook, and I tried hard to convince my mother to give my wife the last chance. I stood against my mother and my wife came back, even though from inside I am not convinced of her because all we eat is from the restaurant or if my sister cooks, because she is busy, and my mother is no longer able to work in the kitchen because of the many diseases – may God heal her and heal her – and during these last months my wife cooks for us, but the cooking has not changed and all the food she cooks is thrown into the trash, and my wife still does not know the amount of food or the cook. Percent, she swears and says, by God, it is sweet and there is nothing in it.

In addition to that, my wife has more than one defect that bothers me, as she talks a lot and gives lip service to saying after saying without getting bored or tired. And honestly, I’m tired of the food you cook, I can’t eat it, and I often go out to the restaurant to eat.

There is a more important matter, although I do not want to wrong my wife, but I had problems at work for more than a year before I got married, and despite that I worked, thank God, but since the day I got married, my work has almost stopped, especially the last five months, and the shop was closed a month after marriage, and I opened it by the court because of hateful people in my line of work, and three months ago they closed the shop, and until now I have not been able to open it, and I do not know why every time I try to do anything, everything gets complicated and there is no work, although, praise and thanks be to God, I have goods. And pray and read the Koran and seek forgiveness and more of the supplication. I know that livelihood is in the hands of God Almighty, but I review myself and say do I have to change the door of the house as it came in the story of Ismail, peace be upon him, and that our master Ibrahim, peace be upon him, was visiting Ismail and his mother, and when he came to visit Ismail after he got married (he did not find Ismail, so he asked his wife about him, and she said: He went out to spend the night Go lina) Then he asked her about their way of life and way of life, and she said: We are human beings, and we are in distress and hardship, so she complained to him, and he said: So If your husband comes, read peace upon him, and tell him to change his doorstep) I do not want to dwell on you in more detail about what is the solution.

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Dear reader, we thank you for your trust and your request for advice, and what we feel of your keenness to preserve and adhere to your home. We understand how you feel about the repeated pressure from those around you to separate and end the relationship, the feeling that you are defying your mother by sticking to your wife, and perhaps the fear that you will not justify her. But is it really worth ending the marriage because she can’t cook the way you think is good? Perhaps her family did not lie, and she really knows how to cook in the way she used to in her family’s house, because food and drink are, after all, tastes. Each house has its own way of preparing food and its own taste in eating it. And 8 months is not at all a long time for your bride to imbibe your way of preparing food and knowing your taste.

More importantly, the way you chose the bride wasn’t right at all. It never makes sense to get to know the bride on the wedding day. Your mother and sister may see it as suitable for you, but is this enough to build a home? Is knowing that she can cook enough to start a family? It looked like you were looking for a cook, not a wife!

You are supposed to get to know each other and search for the extent of compatibility between your two personalities so that you do not wrong her or yourself by marrying her. You may be able to teach any woman to cook, but you have the same character and qualities. How can you learn it?

So the fault in this marriage was shared by both parties, and wrong by wrong should never be reconciled. You indicated that your wife is stubborn when teaching her to cook and complains a lot. Perhaps she does not feel familiar or comfortable with the way she is taught. Sometimes advice is given to a person in a way that makes him love to implement it, and sometimes it is directed to him in a very repulsive and annoying way that makes him unable to accept and swallow it.

We agree with you that a lot of complaining and abusing the husband is one of the disturbing faults, which makes the house full of negative energy, but we are trying to see the matter from her point of view, as she certainly feels that you do not accept her, and that you are annoyed with her, and perhaps even your mother’s request to divorce her. How do you expect her to be a happy, content and giving wife under these circumstances?

Try to treat her better, to make her feel your love, acceptance and satisfaction with her, and perhaps the magic of love will do what orders and criticisms did not do!

As for the work crisis, many homes suffer from financial hardship from time to time, and many young people in the first years of marriage face financial troubles, and the matter has nothing to do with choosing a wife well or not. It also has nothing to do with your violation of your mother’s order to divorce your wife. In its answer to a similar question, the Egyptian Dar Al-Iftaa affirmed that the son should not obey his parents in divorcing his wife, but rather preserve his wife and his family as much as he could, pointing out that divorcing the wife is not from their righteousness; Noting that being kind to one’s parents means being kind to them with soft and gentle words that indicate kindness and love, and avoiding harsh words that lead to alienation, and linking that with compassion, kindness, courtship, and benevolence with money and other good deeds.