“I am a thirty-seven-year-old girl. I lost my father early, at the age of 14, and my relationship with my mother was very bad until she passed away less than a year ago. At the moment I live alone because my brothers are twenty and thirty years older than me. They have their families and their lives, but my relationship with them is Very good, 11 years ago I got to know a young man and I loved him very much, but unfortunately it was one-sided love, he knows very well the truth of my feelings but he did not love me back, except that we were constantly communicating, and even in the periods when we were far from each other we had spiritual communication and ideas It often makes me feel like he’s in trouble or upset.

My feelings towards him have never changed, although he has many relationships and is very nervous, and mistakes are easy on his tongue, and his relationships were mostly transgressions and sometimes reached a complete forbidden relationship, and I know all this, but I failed to get him out of my thoughts, the last time after us he came back to talk to me after my mother’s death, and I knew at that time that he He got married, and I was amazed because I thought he was the farthest person from such a step.

At the present time, the conversation between us continues despite my constant remorse towards his wife, and despite my knowledge that it is love and attachment without hope, but unfortunately I am unable to overcome it. I feel very lonely, but there remains a feeling that I will not have the most difficult feeling that caused me pain and a feeling of brokenness.”

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Dear reader, your feeling of reprimand towards his wife indicates that your conscience is still vigilant and that your morals and values ​​do not allow you to be involved in treason or be the cause of wounding another person, and perhaps that is what prompted you to send this advice, but your conscience should also reprimand you towards yourself.

The sympathy you feel for his wife, you should also feel for yourself because you wasted 11 years of your life. The problem is not that you didn’t get married during that time and that your life is on hold, but the problem is that you are draining your feelings in a relationship that is doomed to fail and won’t even allow you to develop and learn.

When we enter into a normal emotional relationship from two parties and it does not succeed, even in its failure it is a lesson for us and during it we learn a lot about ourselves and develop emotionally. .

You say that his love is like a chronic disease, and it is a very successful expression, this attachment to him is pathological, and you must resort to a psychologist to help you overcome this relationship and take your hands out of this dark abyss that will only lead you to more darkness and pain, you must empathize with yourself and realize that you deserve Love, and that you deserve to get away from this toxic relationship and enjoy a real emotional life far from guilt, insult, and draining feelings.

Until you turn to a psychologist, you should gradually move away from him, reduce contact with him, and set boundaries so that you do not find yourself involved in the betrayal of a woman who did not commit any mistake except that she was not good at choosing her husband.