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Service and Shusha: “My husband beat me and before insulting me, and he wants to divorce me after only 6 months of marriage.”

Amman Today

publish date 1970-01-01 03:00:00

“I have been married for 6 months in a family home. My husband is very nervous, he always hits me and does not discuss me or hear me. In July, we were in a summer resort with his whole family. He was deliberately dealing with fun and joking with Slyvi, and he would go down to the sea and leave me with his mother on the beach. On the third day of the summer I was exposed For an insult from his sister, he did not defend me and she threatened me that she would marry him to someone who was better than me.

After threatening her, I asked him to speak and open a new page without beating, especially as it affected my psyche and felt insulted, and I hoped it would change and contain me, and I would do what I wanted, he said, God willing, we returned to the chalet. We lasted for a month.” I was surprised that she said my word to him, so he ignored her words and went down to the sea and spent the day very normal and deliberately laughing and joking with Slyvi, but when we returned to the chalet he hit me again to the point that my hair was cut in his hand.

His father intervened and I was surprised by him blaming me and accusing me of always causing scorn for his son, so I witnessed him on what happened, and although he admitted that he was wrong, he let him beat me. After we got home, from the beatings, I got tired and my temperature reached 40, so I asked him for permission to go to my family’s house to rest my nerves for two days, and I actually went, but he left me there and did not ask about me. My family went to them, and they were surprised. They said, “We don’t want her to come back and he can’t stand her.” After a month and a half, his father called my uncle and my brother and told them everything is ours. We don’t want her. The problem is that I do not want a divorce, so what should I do?

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We transferred the problem to Dr. Reham Abdel Rahman, a researcher in mental health and family counseling: First, the wisdom says: “A woman does not cry over the separation of a man who does not appreciate her, but rather cries over her heart, which she preserved for a long time and then gave it to someone who does not deserve it.” Yourself when you accepted the insult and the practices of your husband towards you with violence and his resorting to beating and humiliation and belittling you in solving the problems between you, whatever his motives and justifications were, resorting to psychological and physical violence towards you is a crime against your humanity and your marital rights, which are stipulated by all the heavenly religions, foremost among which is affection and mercy.

And she continued, “Through your letter, madam, I see that your husband is not only suffering from nervousness as you mentioned, but he is also a weak and troubled personality who finds pleasure in harming others and exercising control and domination over them, and this is of course due to several reasons:

Lack of empathy with others and low self-esteem as a result of his parents’ persecution of him and their practice of violence and cruelty in his childhood, or on the other hand, the use of excessive pampering in his upbringing; Therefore, he resorts to violence as a kind of imposing control, developing a sense of self and appreciating it, and exercising the control of others over you, whether his sister, as you mentioned, or his controlling brother’s wife.

And she explains: “You should also know that the husband left his wife insulted by a member of his family in his presence, whether with some words that offend her psyche, such as: “A thousand one wishes” as your husband’s sister mentioned; Where is her husband??!

All these wrong practices against you are evidence of his incomplete manhood and his asceticism in you, and you also sinned not only for accepting the insult, but for letting others interfere in your private affairs, so do not accept that again, and I regret to tell you that he does not see you as his wife who deserves consideration of feelings and good affection. Appreciation and attention to her feelings, he wants to separate from you, but he does not have the courage that men have of confrontation, so he resorts to beatings and insults to force you to leave.

And she continued: “Why, after all this insult, that insult and accusation of theft, do you want to return to him? Is all this enough for you, or is there something that you did not tell us? You have to accept the matter and not look back, for you may hate the matter of separation and God makes a lot of good in it. Therefore, I advise you to flee from Hell.” A man who is only aware of dealing with violence, especially in the absence of children between you.. Whatever their motives towards you and their own reasons, they should not have dealt with you in these abhorrent methods.

And finally: “If your weak heart is still beating with love, then love is compensated, but if dignity is wasted, it will never return.”

Within the framework of the “Seventh Day” keenness to communicate directly with readers, and to provide various and varied services, “The Seventh Day” launched the “Washwasha” service to receive any inquiries or psychological, social or educational problems, provided that the problems are presented to experts and trusted specialists and publish responses via Website and newspaper.

You can contact us through WhatsApp number 01284142493 or e-mail Washwasha@youm7.com or direct link.

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