publish date 1970-01-01 03:00:00
“I am 24 years old, and I am the older sister of three girls, although the girl is her sister’s secret, but I never feel that, the age difference between us is not great, and it is two years between each girl, but I always feel that they are close to each other and far from me, we live in One house, and they always help each other in everything and talk to each other and share secrets, conversations and tales, while in my presence I feel that I am heavy on them, even joking does not accept it from me, although I am very tender to them and I am the first person to stand by their side if they have a problem.
The problem is also that I do not have friends, my mother always kept me away from my friends and was upset if I felt that there was someone close to me, and even my fiancé if she found me talking to him would cause any problem, so they are the first to come to my mind when I want to tell something, they have a secret but it does not happen The opposite. Even so, they reveal my secrets to my mother even though I hate it. I always tell my mother that if I lost my sisters, he wouldn’t be so affectionate with me. Even my mother herself changed with me, I used to feel like her favorite daughter, because I had been working with her in a shop she owned since childhood. But now I feel they are better then than me.
Dear Reader, we understand how much this feeling hurts you and how sensitive and lonely you feel about your position among your sisters. Your thinking and your search for a solution to bridge the distances reflects a normal, reconciled and loving personality. If your personality is not right, it may be the reason for your feeling of closeness and exclusion in your alienation from them and locking yourself in the position of a victim. So we feel very confident that you will be able to achieve what you want, no matter how long or short the time is, because your intention is good and hearts are mirrors, and they will certainly feel the sincerity of your desire to get close to them and the sincerity of your love for them.
Dr. Samar Kishk, a mental health specialist and family counselor, tries to explain the scene to help you understand it. She says that the problem most likely started from the point of the mother’s preference for you in the beginning. This wasn’t your fault at all but it created a chasm between you. And in order to bring the distances closer, she advises you to speak together clearly, transparently and frankly, and bring out what is in your hearts to break down the barrier that the mother’s treatment made at the beginning of your life. Matters must be settled between you, and they must know and hear from you that what happened was not your fault and that you love them from your heart.
Until the time is right for this confrontation, maintain your good manner with them, support them, get close to them, and share the conversation with them, but with regard to disclosing your secrets to them, it is necessary that you keep your precise secrets that you do not want anyone to know to yourself, no matter how close you are and even if you have friends whom you trust, there are secrets that you must Keep it to yourself only and have your own limits in every relationship.
Your letter pointed to another problem that you may be afraid to confront yourself with completely. The mother’s treatment of you and your isolation from friends is wrong, especially as the matter extends to your relationship with your fiancé. Everyone needs a social circle around them to lead a healthy social life. You must insist on having friends in your life, you are good at choosing them, and if the mother insists on her position, the help of an older person and trust in the family may benefit because isolating you from people exposes you to many psychological problems and hinders your social maturity.
Within the framework of the “Seventh Day” keenness to communicate directly with readers, and to provide various and varied services, “The Seventh Day” launched the “Washwasha” service to receive any inquiries or psychological, social or educational problems, provided that the problems are presented to experts and trusted specialists and publish responses via Website and newspaper.
You can contact us through WhatsApp number 01284142493 or e-mail Washwasha@youm7.com or direct link.
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Source : اخبار الاردن