“I am psychologically broken and my family abandoned me.” The terrifying words make you more painful when you get to know more about their owner. He is a student in the third year of secondary school. His suffering did not begin after the results appeared, but rather two months before the exams, as he said: “I was a superior student, I always get grades.” I finished all exams in private lessons during the year, and now I am a psychologically broken person, I failed in some subjects and I am supposed to enter the second round exams, after I had a strange condition two months before the exams, I stopped studying completely. I had no energy to study and no ability to focus.

I tried a lot to study but failed. The fatigue of a whole year was lost in two months. The biggest problem is that my family completely abandoned me and let me down. Financially and morally, and all the time, “words that poison the body,” I became unbearable and lost hope in everything, even my ambition for the college I dreamed of.

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Dear reader, the bitterness of loss is cruel, especially when you are one iota from achieving your hope and goal, and when you feel that you have spared no effort in pursuit of the dream; But the loss often entails a bigger, more important, and more valuable lesson. The lesson may have come early, but it will undoubtedly help you, if you don’t leave yourself stuck at this point. And the pleasure of reaching your goal and your dream will be doubled when you arrive after you have tasted the bitterness of losing it.

Dr. Azza Zayan, a family relations consultant, says that the most important step to overcome this moment, and this feeling of being broken, is to determine for yourself the reason why you lost your ability to focus and study at that crucial time, to make sure that you will not face the same problem again. The reason may be your fear of exams, your enthusiasm and your awareness of the importance of the exam, and the reason may be quarrels in the home or your exposure to pressure from parents in a way that annoyed you rather than motivating you. Sit down with yourself and clearly identify the cause so that you can address it and then move on.

You should not give in to this bump in your path. Barriers are sometimes placed in our way to learn with time and experience how to jump higher and succeed in overcoming and overcoming them, thus, these barriers act as an incentive to improve ourselves, develop our skills, and continue to strive harder. You also have to address your feelings of guilt. As long as that’s all you can, you should never blame yourself for something outside of your control.

As for the family, it is important that you talk to them about your feelings. You speak clearly and frankly about why you lost your focus, and that you were just as keen on your dream as they are and maybe more. They are also partners in the responsibility, as they had to notice that there was a problem during the two months that I could not study.

For every family that goes through a similar experience, the family relations consultant says that children expect their parents to provide them with unconditional love, not conditional on obedience, excellence, or fulfillment of their dreams. We should support our children in their stumbles before they succeed, and be a source of reassurance rather than an additional source of fear of exams.